How To Be Late to Events. 

Lateness sucks, we all know, but for a reason, we all know that person who’s always late to events, functions, classes, dinner, and every single place. They just can’t be early. 

One of the questions friends ask friends who are late is, ‘What were you doing all along?’ Another, ‘I thought I woke you up earlier?’ And the questions continue and continue. 

Although people, by being late have lost jobs, flights, even future wives and husbands, the team of latecomers wouldn’t be stopped. Not once, twice or even thrice, they just cannot be early, period! 

But in this post, I’ve tried to discover how people arrive late to functions and just in case you may want to try it out sometime, or hand some good advise to someone who you wish would change their ways, you could borrow some tips from me. 

Whether lateness is intentional or unfortunate, the results over the years have been drastic on the people who’ve embraced it. For some, it’s no bother until it causes serious humiliation. 

To be late, the first thing to do is to Wake Up Terribly late. People who are late usually, if they have a meeting at 8:00am, would wake up at 6:58, and stretch till 7:05 when they have to go and take their bath. The funny part of people who are late is how they panic after they see the time. They are able to create the impression they are in a hurry, but the usual always happens and they become very late. 

Becoming a professional also means Befriending your towel or morning coat. Professional latecomers are towel people. Bathing, an integral aspect of their day, becomes a dragging process and they roam about their rooms, or find an interesting conversation to feed on. There are times latecomers would go to the bathroom, lament on how cold the tap water feels, and decide to heat some water. Then, they prolong their time of arrival, as usual. 

Don’t struggle to be late, Be a phone person, it’s as simple as that. From Whatsapp, to replying emails, and just pressing the phone for no particular reason. Then for some grade B latecomers, it is Calling A Friend for a long conversation, and guess what, they share the fact that they will be late if they don’t hang up and the call continues and continues. 

Another mind-boggling thing latecomers do is Taking Meticulous Footsteps as though they are processing to a wedding or party.These  people deserve an applause. Those who are perfect at pulling the trick of walking as briskly as possible when the first eye contact is made with the people at the event. This draws an image of an unfortunate punctual individual whereas in actual sense they have deceived you perfectly. Oh, don’t you remember those days our teachers and lecturers would be pleased one of our colleagues walked briskly even though they were late? 

People, another way to get late is ironing later with style. I’m certain their heads are bowed down and they are asking, ‘How did he know all this?’ The late comer usually irons with style. Spray starch, water and whatever thing would make them look remarkably dressed. Is that compensation enough? 

Applying Make-up is another beautiful way of becoming late. Our flamboyant ladies would paint, erase, re-paint, re-re-paint and when they finally get it right, the next thing they move unto is accessorizing adorably to make a case. ‘I know I was late, but spare me, all I was trying to do was look good for y’all’. Then the new deal for latecomers is the ‘Selfie-life’ which involves taking shots from a million angles and sending them probably to friends and family to seek approval. 

They love the Transport/traffic Blame game. When latecomers are stuck in traffic, their case becomes stronger. ‘I was stuck in traffic oh’, ‘it’s not my fault’. And the lost goes on. 

Are you a late comer, a habitual late comer, let’s emphasize. There are genuine times where we are late, and we feel absolutely bad, especially, when obstacles such as a police confrontation on the road occurred, having a flat tyre, severe emergencies, and the like. 

Some have also argued and bitterly complained about the fact that most local events do not start on time, people don’t arrive early and that they have every laudable excuse to be late. Whose fault? Ask Ghanaian event organizers. 

Friends, let me ask, ‘Is it necessary to defend your reason for being late always or respectful to accept your mistake?’ 

I’ll be waiting to hear you share your comments. 

I’ve shared these tips with you, the choice is yours, but like what I try to do, I give honor to whom honor is due, Uncle Ebo Whyte, thank you for being a role model when it comes to punctuality and promptness. God bless you for inspiring our lives. 

Happy Mother’s Day Weekend. 

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