You’ll locate them in the family, school, church and workplace. It’s either these people have had a distasteful or unpleasant record or have an appearance that is doubtful, a funny look or a face that seems deviant.
Four years ago, Harold was imprisoned by the local police because they assumed he was a part of a gang who were causing so much harm to residents. Harold had piercings on his tongue and ears. He had his hair braided, which he usually kept unkempt. He lay in prison, silent, innocent and wrongfully accused.
Harold had relocated to the city from his neighbourhood, some miles away. He had a past of mental disorder and was gradually recovering, with the help of a woman he had made friends with. He left because the discrimination was absolutely untolerable, people called him names and he could not bare the acts against him.
But his fate was turned. This isn’t far from our world today. This society does much. People use faces, kinetics, mannerisms, and appearances to judge people.
Men or women who dress well, appear extra conscious of their appearance, are usually perceived to like lots of ladies or men. People, without knowing them, call them names, formulate their own conclusions about them and poison others with their opinions, usually adding to their words, ‘don’t you see?’ They push their opinions so hard the others have to see, whether they like it or yes.
People with braids, (especially men) piercings are perceived rascals or drug abusers. Neighbours discuss them, friends talk negatively about them and there are examples, usually falsified in an attempt to justify the fact that these people have a problem.
Another group of people who are usually accused wrongly are men who appear to have some exterior female mannerisms. Soft spoken, emotional, and fragile. And people conclude, he’s one of them. Call them names, tease and shun their company. ‘Have you seen the way he walks and talks to people? I think he’s prefers men.’ And women with the boy-thing are also accused, perceived to have a thing for other females. Stories upon stories upon stories about them.
Dear Judge, who made you a judge? Drawing conclusions on people’s appearance is a crime I wish I would not commit.
People are verbally abused for their faultless personality, people are emotionally down because others have refused to see the truth about their lives. In actual sense, when someone begins to draw conclusions, in that manner, being a judge, it shows one thing: These are the likes who could easily be duped by others’.
Same here, bitter experience, that’s exactly how I thought, until I learnt the hard way.
A young man once came to a shop where I worked. As I served customers and checked sales, he entered the shop looking well tucked in, and the first words that came out of his mouth seemed perfect. He spoke good English and was heavily polite.
He spoke of how stranded he was, how he genuinely had no money. I had some personal money on me and so helped this young man with some money, far less than what he asked.
His disappointment was obvious. He needed something from the sales I had made. And his trick hadn’t succeeded. It was briefly after he had left, I realised how careless I had been with my money because I had believed a fraud, someone who wasn’t telling any truth and had registered massive displeasure at my assistance.
It happens. Once they’re well dressed, they’re perfect. Once they’re men and play football, watch sports, go out with friends, they should like women. And our deformity informs us all through.
Friend, people have lost the opportunity of living with amazing people, who have flaws you assigned to them that aren’t real. How many times, have you come back to say to yourself, ‘Joana is a very nice person, I never knew’.
Be a good judge, that’s if you want to. Seek good evidence before drawing conclusions, be certain that your statements are true, or else, you are that person that causes people emotional pain, mental stress and even suicide because they are victims of your perception.
If first impressions count, ask questions on why people divorce and you may get the mathematic right.
I know you could do better. Have a pleasant day.
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