Relationships start beautifully, but in the end, when things don’t work out one surely has to leave for one reason or the other. The biggest question is whether we should allow them back, as visitors or Just Friends.
Some call them ex and they mean ex for real. That simply means they put a large ex on their names and virtually wouldn’t want to have anything to do with them. As usual, I love to hear people’s experiences so I would give you a scenario of someone who had to endure the trauma of an angry and jealous ex.
Her name is Denise, my first girlfriend. She was amazing, fair and suited my taste. Big stuff, friendly, polite and prayerful. Friends for three years, best friends for three days and a girlfriend for six months. I wish we still remained friends, because it was just after I had proposed, she started misbehaving big time. There was a time she entered my hostel room, told all my friends to go out because she had an issue to settle with me. ‘Wow’ I stood there quietly. I asked my friends to gently move out and they complied, because they knew she was calm, and most of them liked our relationship. She began yelling and screaming. Why? She had seen me talking to Adjoa twice in a day. That got her angry. I apologised.
Two days later, in the middle of the street, she saw me holding hands with Selina and she got furious. She hit Selina with her bag and the two girls fought like cats and dogs.
I was in a cave. A love cave. As if that was not enough, she had secretly called my mom to tell her I was having a lot of affairs with different girls on campus. And my mom got real furious because she knew her, she knew she loved me genuinely. It was enough. She wanted to control everything, my food, my friends, my life. I warned her, patiently, thrice, it wasn’t going to work that way, still to no avail. It got worse.
I had to be a man. So I did what a man would do. I showed her the exit. Could we please stop all this. I couldn’t take it any more. She did not care. She shouted and said ‘Im a fool, I let this jerk into my life’ she returned all my gifts and I stayed mute.
Just two weeks after that she had found new love. John, another friend. I looked lonely, but at least, there was less trouble.
A whole year, no call, no communication, nothing.
Final year, three months to complete school, I met Linda, not so much of my ‘taste’ but she had one thing, a heart of gold and I’ll add silver. Very friendly, humble and decent. She visited me and we had fun. Just a month after walking with her, Denise showed up. Her new friend was my roommate Johnson. It was funny. It was funny and annoying. She laughed with my Johnson, and you realised he was not comfortable. She sang songs, I’ve got mine, those things girls do. My roommate wasn’t happy, very intolerant, he asked her never to resurface. Two weeks, and I’m receiving flowers and gifts almost every weekend. Cards upon cards, I’m sorry, please forgive me. She came to my room and cried all night.
What was I to do?
Sometimes these people called ex(s) are trouble and nothing else. But the question is, is it worth it allowing them into our lives?
Bobbywrites would love to hear from you, cherished bobbyreads and your stories. Lets get interactive.
It’s relationship Wednesday. Love your God, love your neighbour, love your self.